28 stubborn Stolen from papotheclown-- Louise Erdrich: “Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on Earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself that you tasted as many as you could.” Today was an apple tasting day, despite everything Baba has developed a mysterious illness. The symptoms only manifest when he's on the phone or when he sees me within earshot. Thoughts and prayers. Because I cut off my siblings, he's having trouble getting to me He had to use Tante Z Tante Z just can't be a flying monkey It's too funny She's still the annoyed kid sister "Your father called. I mean...I'm mad at him too but what can we do? Every family has an *Egyptian curse word I am choosing to translate as asshole* or two. Don't let him ruin your holiday, go to the beach!" That's the plan Tante :) On the way, Tante Duck saw me walking and hit the brakes hard on her Jeep I thought I was going to be kidnapped or harassed until I saw her teeny frame and giant sunhat with flowers I got in and she chuckled at being mistaken for a kidnapper Duck, for reasons I don't care to learn, is persona non grata in granny clique land At the beach I had a strawberry milkshake I gave Duck my elbow and walked her up to the water, we stood knee deep for a minute or two before I offered her a retreat escort Then we watched a couple of people paramotor way too close to our palm frond umbrellas and way too high above the sea-- we don't have health and safety regulations but we do have good times for cheap if you're a teeny bit suicidal I swam, gave Duck some kisses Promised a panicked Tante Z on the phone that I was leaving And nobody saw anything and I didn't say anything about anything I PROMISE "You know she invited herself to the Opera outing? With MY friends. I don't know why she wants me to spell it out for her, it's really too much" (This is why I liked Austen and the Bronte sisters so much growing up--19th century society and the social world Z operates in are very similar) I got a work email tante, don't worry, Duck and I aren't particularly close The work overlords usually send me projects that take 30 minutes tops but this time, I spent hours typing in my maillot which was getting itching and itchier K kept sending messages asking to see me before she heads to Marsa Matrouh (big pretty resort town) for the week Once I finished, I ran downstairs and jumped in the pool I did my demon exorcising laps until my legs and arms tingled Then I noticed a man hanging off the roof of a building I have a new favorite village character Satellite repair guy, wears a fedora-- FREE CLIMBS THE BUILDINGS in the fedora I squeaked and shook my head in the pool No one so much as blinked Later I got accused of preferential treatment My swim cap tore and the life guard said I can just do a bun and keep swimming A woman muttered "how come?" Her friend said "because she's pretty" in a really bitter way All my heart heard was "because she's pretty" and I danced in the water It was motivation to dress up chic later when I met K at the football pitch She and a very cute soccer mama were wearily watching their boys play No bench I got out snacks and my speaker and showed them how to sit on their shoes We bopped to Egyptian rap, French pop, sang Nothing Compares 2 U loud enough to embarrass the children "Let's take selfies to commemorate this suddenly romantic atmosphere" At some point they left to get more snacks and a child got injured The kids all turned to look at me ... Shit Um...hello habibi, where does it hurt? "He kicked the ball into my stomach" Oh owwy, Im sorry. Well, I think you'll be okay *pat pat* Other kid "IT'S HIS OWN FAULT" I don't think we need to get into that right now while he's hurt Third kid, "HE CURSES A LOT" Again, maybe not the time to discuss that *injured child starts swearing* Ooookaaay, we're all doing a five minute time out Injured sweary child and his sister decide to leave after arguing with two other kids Confused mamas show up with snacks I called a timeout, injury drama The boys explain the situation and back up my call (thank you small dudes) Game resumes Mamas switch to a Spanish playlist and I dance (I have to dance when I hear Spanish music, probably my Filipino genes) And I realize I haven't danced in public in ages It felt so good and we drew in a small crowd Now my eyelids are doing the sleepy dance Thank you for yesterday, diaryland people -- it means a lot to me ❤️ |