Advantages of Crying -Prevents water poisoning -Clears up contact lenses when solution is unavailable -Burns calories by exercising lungs, tear ducts and snot glands -Reduces risk of repressing sadness that is later expressed as homicidal rage -Feeds plants in arid areas -Improves singing range by either providing a high squeaky soprano voice or a low growly grunge voice...or both -Moisturizes face -Can be used to salt food -Quickly and effectively communicates that one is in need of a hug and/or lots of space -Most preferred manifestation of sadness and extreme happiness by humans since the dawn of time References available upon request. |