vegan turkey slowly my walls are coming down my work friends see my unmasked self my bus comes when they let the little school kids out I smile at them but my chest hurts and I turn my face up and I inhale and I blink to keep the tears in they look just like the kids in the videos at work we get updates an unfolding situation in Israel might delay some packages "they're Louis Vuittons, this is BULLSHIT" "thank GOD an American" "Oh, you're Egyptian American, how interesting. My heart breaks for Gaza" --oo, not racist? I sound like a white girl, so they feel they can confide in me I wish I didn't nobody confides in the black guy from Georgia (he sits next to me sometimes, nice guy) he has an easier time than the others and I also get through most calls without too much trouble our friends with accents don't if I've learned anything these past few weeks it's to avoid sending anything through UPS if I can help it what else? I got a new lamp, I'll fix the old lamp, I will I went to the dentist, there was no tooth to pull! there was a pocket. he scaled my teeth and said we're zapping the pocket with prescription mouthwash. then I bought a journal, it's a cactus print that says "all you need is a hug" I take pictures of the building and the buses someone scooching down the slide the napping dogs I'm so jealous of tired people sipping coffee on the escalators I'll sketch them and then paint them, I don't know when when I quit we get the 23rd off for Thanksgiving four years ago I was eating vegan turkey in San Francisco I don't think I'll be at this company next year I hope not my supervisor's a close talker I tried to explain it to the kids but they haven't watched Seinfeld if he weren't cute it'd be annoying but he's really cute so my face just goes red whenever he's coaching me and he winks when he says hey to people (don't worry he winks at everybody regardless of gender, it's not creepy, I checked) where do people get the confidence to wink? winks and sunglasses, very impressive my other crush is the account supervisor from training whom half my batch is lusting after so basically just everyone inappropriate in terms of hierarchy they're really muscly they express all their feelings in the gym I guess I tried to do that I forgot my towel and showed up for my shift looking like a drowned rat and I lost my shampoo and deodorant I told myself I'd work out after my shifts but I always just run to the buses there's a creep on the bus I'm trying to bore him thankfully our shifts rotate so I don't always run into him guys here, creeps here, think that foreign women are easy I should date somebody muscly I should get muscly two more weeks and then I pass my challenge if I still have the headaches I'm quitting if my body adjusts I'll try to keep going |