Day 14 is a doozy Can I just say I love it here? That I can be as silly as I want And talk about heaviness In the same line even And nobody's waiting for their turn to talk over me And I don't need punctuation And I don't need to dumb things down I can be the one crying and ranting I can be angry No because what if my life really is an emotional hellscape I had to pay someone to teach me to cry with noise If I'm angry or sad, it's irritating or it's a competition If I'm happy, I need to be quiet about it, because it's painful for them I had to make a space to exist And now that space has a little online extension and I love it And I love me I love being goofy I love making esoteric references with zero explanation I love letting the dark lord in my head loose I love dragging you into my love life Ozzy said he dreamed about teleporting into my bedroom, unremarkable But he felt uncomfy because I was surrounded by girlfriends, MULTIPLE The angels in my head, the confidence this gives me, the relief and comfort I wish I could squish and kiss a webpage Thank you for being my friend Thank you every diary I've had since I was 8 I was almost a serial killer Or at least a murder suicider I'm pretty sure I can't really imagine what all of that built up inside me would do but I know it would be violent and ugly Good night/morning |